Heidi Macdonald nails exactly why the fantastic four movie is completely ignorable.
My wife has been asking me about WHO exactly The Silver Surfer is... and I keep bringing up Galactus... you know.. the big purple helmuted planet eater... But of course... In a movie with a rock man, invisible girl, fire kid, and stretchy man, as well as a intergalactic surfer... Having a giant guy in a purple helmet would be... you know... silly. So "he’s replaced by a whirly cloud that would be at home in a 60s episode of STAR TREK."
WHAT?!? NO BIG PURPLE HELMET? No Planet eating dude with a booming voice, and a Silver Surfer on a leash? Then there is absolutely no reason to see the new FF4 movie...
Here's what you won't be seeing:
I mean shit... can you imagine that dialog performed by someone like... say Sam Jackson? Who would be the perfect counterpoint to Silver surfer's voice, Laurence Fishburne. Somewhere across the multiverse, there is a Fantastic Four movie with Galactus, voiced by Samual Jackson, doing his best James Earl Jones imitation. Someone call The Watcher, and have him send me a bootleg dvd of that particular piece of "what if" magic.
